Merry Christmas, kiss my ass
by I-write-hurt-not-comfort
Summary: The first time Noé discovers Christmas. (Vanitas isn't impressed.) / just some Vannoé xmas fluff


_**(A/Ns: merry Christmas guys! :3 and yeah, the title is from an all time low song. enjoy!)**_

* * *

 **~ Merry Christmas, kiss my ass ~**

When Vanitas returned to their hotel room, at precisely 9am in the morning, he was _not_ impressed.

He'd been out the entire night with Dante, initially working on a case before retreating to one of the local bars. Undoubtedly, he had been exhausted, and so it had only made sense that he retired to Dante's hotel rather than returning to his.

However, if Vanitas had _known_ Noé would spend his time alone transforming their room into a… a Christmas cesspool, perhaps he wouldn't have returned _at all._

In the corner of the room, rather than the chair (God knows where the chair actually went), there was a _gigantic_ tree, covering in tinsel and baubles, looking like some glitter fairy had vomited on it. Topping that off was an angel which looked creepily like Roland – it made Vanitas' stomach turn.

The rest of the room was accessorised by brightly coloured tinsel, which glinted in the morning sun. Every piece of furniture had at least two strands hung off it. Really, it wasn't necessary.

"Noé," Vanitas said nonchalantly, his words bluntly unimpressed. "What is this?"

His face lighting up instantly, Noé spun on his heel. There was a glint in his eyes when he spoke, waving his arms excitedly, like a child. "I'm so glad you asked, Vanitas! You see, Domi told me this morning – only _this morning_ , can you believe it?! – that there's this holiday people celebrate here called _Christmas_! And! _And_ they give _gifts_ and play games and eat lots of… of… Tarte Tatin! Isn't that right, Domi?!"

"It certainly is, my dear Noé~"

Only at the sound of her voice did Vanitas realise Domi was even there, stretched across Noé's bed with her face in a magazine. Well, right up until Vanitas glared directly at her, that was, when she lowered the magazine and responded with a mocking, derogatory stare.

"Why did you introduce this _kid_ to Christmas?" Vanitas sighed exhaustedly, throwing his bag on the floor and shrugging off his coat. Languidly, he stretched, before dropping down onto his bed. His bed, which produced an audible rustle of tinsel.

"No particular reason," Domi chuckled. " _Well,_ other than the fact I was _sure_ this would happen."

"To piss me off, then," Vanitas grumbled.

"Vanitas! Are you telling me you _don't_ love Christmas?!" Noé yelped in exaggerated horror.

"… you discovered Christmas 2 hours ago."

Wordlessly, Noé shifted where stood. Then, with determination gleaming in his eyes, he looked straight at Vanitas, and asked, "Do you… not have good memories with it?"

"I have nothing good to recall of it." Vanitas stated blandly. It was a lie, of course, but the good memories he harboured were for him, and for him only. "But I only ever remember the despair in things anyway."

"Oh boohoo," Domi gave a sarcastic pout.

Vanitas shot another bitter glare back at her.

"Well… w-why don't we create _new_ memories for you?!" Noé blurted out before he could stop himself.

In an instant, Vanitas' glare switched from Domi to Noé. "No way in hell. I just want to _sleep_."

Noé felt a pout tugging at his lips, as Vanitas turned over and buried his face in the pillow. But a moment later, Vanitas shifted, and Noé grinned internally knowing that the other could _feel_ his disappointed staring.

"Quit frowning at me like!" Vanitas sulked. Then, with a visible roll of the eyes, he let out a heavy sigh, and turned back towards Noé. " _Fine_. I'll… go out with you later, or something. _If_ you let me sleep now."

The moment Noé's face lit up, Vanitas had to turn away in fear that he would actually _smile_.

"I knew you'd come to eventually." Noé smiled. Then, his tone softened. "Merry Christmas, Vanitas."

"Tch," Vanitas scoffed, but this time, he failed to stop the slight grin twitching at his lips. "Merry Christmas too, idiot."


End file.
